MIDLAND, Texas — Registered nurse case managers, have you heard of them?
They are responsible for making sure hospitalized patients leave with the right medication, environment, and care.
But for RN Case Worker Lorie Simpson, her duties include much more.
"So, a lot of times I do pull up a chair to the bedside and I do have an intimate conversation with them regarding just kind of who they are," said Simpson. "I get to learn them as a person, I get to learn their needs, of course, post-discharge because that's my number one job here."
The job can be extremely rewarding, but for those with a big heart, like Simpson, it can be hard to let go.
"I know personally, to speak for myself, I think I do fall in love with my patients," she said. "So I want to make sure that I am taking care of him as a whole, not just focusing on their illness or why they're here.
A lot of times these patients may come to us lost, broken, hopeless and if I'm able to go in and share a smile or hold their hand and say a prayer with them. then that's something I think goes a lot further than just their discharge plan."
To handle the heartbreak, Simpson says takes to journaling and snapping photos of their hands.
"You know, whether it's a little quote or something that the patient said that made me laugh or something that the family did. Sometimes the memories that I write down are not sad, they're happy things, they're happy times and happy memories. Over time, I've learned you can tell a lot about a person and about their hands. I remember my mother's hands the way they looked when I was a little girl," said Simpson.
"So this is one of my favorite quotes. I have it here with my grandparent's hands. It says, 'you held my hand for a little while, but you hold my heart forever,"' said Simpson.
But Simpson remembers one patient that taught her the importance of forgiveness forever.
In August 2019, 60-year-old Steve was transient and homeless.
One day he had a stroke and collapsed, so he was brought to Midland Memorial as an unidentified "John Doe."
"He was very hopeless very lost very broken," said Simpson.
The damage he took from the fall severely affected his ability to talk.
"So once he was extubated he still really could not communicate, but he did I guess take whatever bit of energy he had to dig deep and he was able to tell us his first name and his last name. As well as the area of Texas his family lived in," said Simpson.
Shortly after, several quick-thinking nurses turned to the internet and found contact with his family.
"With the permission of his family I was able to go to the bedside, they were not able to get right here right away once they figured out that he was with us and we were able to FaceTime. He saw his son and his sister for the first time in ten years via FaceTime," said Simpson.
Steve had an addiction to alcohol and lost touch with himself and his family for years.
"Of course a lot of tears were shed it was a very emotional time, but something that was beautiful that happened in that first conversation with his family was forgiveness," said Simpson.
With Simpson's history of hospice patients, her gut told her Steve didn't have much time left.
She was right.
Turning to her journal and camera, she got to work venting, the best way she knew how.
"I have learned as a nurse how important it is to say I’m sorry. How important it is to maintain relationships. This special man thought he had no one. He thought he was hopeless. But in the end, his amazing sister and unbelievably amazing son taught each of us so much about love and grace. They loved him no matter what choices he had made and when he closed his eyes and took his final breath, he went to Heaven knowing he was loved and forgiven," wrote Simpson.
After Simpson shared the way she harvested Steve's memory with his family, they too returned the favor.
With the holidays around, sometimes the pinch of guilt creeps up and reminders us of our past and failed relationships.
Those who can turn the other cheek, and forgive, that can finally live at peace.